Greedy youth

Hello. I really enjoyed myself today to the extent of losing control over my diet. I don't know if this is a good thing to be less obsessed with my weight now. Recently, I ate junk food like nobody's business.

After today's meeting up with BBJLB for a good catch up at the KTV/walking around/flea market, I really think that it is about time to get myself back into the serious mode for some strict diet. Honestly, I didn't know how I did it previously. Right now, after a series of binge eating and junking, I am still 50kg, so I had this mentality that "Hey I won't grow fat no matter how much I eat!" That was the reason why I kept pushing my diet to "tomorrow" and that "tomorrow" is never here.

Especially Ning, who's really crazy when she loses control over food, but is really determined when it comes to losing the weight she gained. I see how she's being ignorant of all the food temptations around, how she insists on drinking enough water and stop eating when she's not hungry anymore. While she's having full control of the food she puts in her mouth, my mind was preoccupied with what will be the next item that I must have to stuff into my mouth. I cannot stop eating once I start, unless it's meat. I will lose all appetite when I see meat.

Sighs. It has been a month... No results at all. When I was gorging myself with Bo Luo Bao in HK, I told myself that I will start my diet when I return and will only eat roti prata and kaya toast when I'm back to 46~47kg. Well, I ate countless kaya toasts already. And I am still a 50kg fatty (for my height, it's really not a pleasant figure hahaha).

That "tomorrow" will come tomorrow. It will either be a good start/a delayed "tomorrow" again. It's my grandmother's birthday and I can expect a full table of yummy dishes for dinner and a birthday cake. If I can do this previously, I can do it tomorrow too. I will aim to stop when I'm not hungry and will not touch the cake AT ALL. I can win temptations. I will not succumb. I think? Hm, hopefully. Hahahaha.

Diet Day 0
I will start tomorrow.